Today is my grandfather’s birthday. Today my thoughts were filled with him. I miss him a lot, he was really special.
It has been a quiet day to myself so far. I’ve agreed to meet 3 different friends at some point in the day, one at 2, one at 5, one at 730, and one at 930, lol… jeez, talk about a busy social calendar - this is SO unlike me! This morning I slept in until 8 and then uploaded photos to my zip drive so I could make CDs for the friends who had gone on trips with me. I went for a late breakfast at 930 in my favourite restaurant. It’s been awhile since I’ve been there alone, so the restaurant staff took advantage of the time to gather round and watch me eat and push one another for the job of refilling my water or bringing extra food to my table.
I tried the market a couple times to get the photo CDs made, but the power outages were quite bad today so I kept missing my chance! I did finally drop them off while the power was on and half-way through the power went out. You might think that people who depend on computers as part of their job would have some sort of battery backup to at least get them through saving or finishing the one thing they were working on, but I have only seen one person set up this way so far.
So after the market I met my friend Limon for lunch. We went to Hilsha Fish, a restaurant near the Shai Bazaar and had fish, green mango, daal and rice, it was very nice. When we finished lunch we went on our way to visit his family. While enroute I got a call from Shahed that his son was very sick and he had been given emergency leave to go home for a week, he asked me to meet him at the station. Limon was good enough not to mind and we redirected our rickshaw wallah back the way we came to meet at the station.
Shahed arrived and said he was going to try and get a ticket for later that evening after he went back and got his bags. Turned out that there was a train leaving shortly and he decided to take it because he would get home six hours sooner. I waited while he bought a ticket and visited for the half hour until the train arrived. His roommate also came, he is a good friend, and he visited with Limon while I visited with Limon. This is probably the last time I am going to see him, so I was sad to leave and couldn’t help the tears as he boarded and the train left the station… man, goodbyes are hard, WHY don‘t they get any easier?
We stood on the platform and I waved for as long as I could still see Shahed with his whole upper body sticking out the train window waving and disappearing into the distance. Limon did a good job of trying to cheer me up and we continued on our way again to meet his family. I pushed my head “back in the game” and let go of my sadness and chatted with Limon in the rickshaw.
“We are not a rich family…” was how he began as we pulled into his neighbourhood, and I shushed him and told him I didn’t care about how rich his family might be, that I was just happy to be visiting. First I met his mom, sister, and father. They served me fruit and fishcakes and tea and we sat and visited. His sister spoke English well so the three of us chatted while his mom looked around and tried to get me to eat for 3. As we sat neighbours kept poking their head in, many of them (let’s say about 15?) jammed into the doorway to watch us, Limon had a ball the whole time and kept saying “you are very interesting for them!” After we took a few pictures we continued on, as he has 5 uncles and we were promised to visit each house in turn, so away we went!
One house to the next, each family feeding and watering me, they were all very kind and very excited and friendly. A few times they asked questions, mostly they commented on how white I am (I *SWEAR* I have been trying to get a tan!) and how friendly I was.
When we visited with one of his cousins, a very lovely girl with good English skills, said gave me a glass of ice cold 7-Up in a pretty mug. When I commented on the pretty blue and silver design on the mug she said “it is my most favourite mug, so I wanted you to use it when you came to visit.” Such a sweet thing to do, the gesture wasn’t lost on me.
Onto the next house and despite being full from lunch and snacks at the past 3 houses plates of cookies and chips and other dried snacks and more 7-Up came out. The power had gone out while we were in the second house and the girls each took turns fanning me with a bamboo fan. We took pictures as we went along It was her favourite mug, to me “You know Shauna, you look just like a Barbie!” I laughed, a lot, and shook my head as I said thank you, swallowing my comments of argument because it would have been futile to try. “No, really! Just like a Barbie, it’s really true!” She walked arm in arm with me the rest of the way. After the 5th house the aunty invited me to stay for dinner. I thanked her very much and told her that I already had plans with a friend for dinner, so we went on our way.
Limon and I walked out to the main road stopping here and there on the way to say hello to different people. In the market I tried a new snack called Putchka, little shells filled with lentils and egg and onions and other stuff I can’t even tell you without google (it has been quite the exercise, getting used to going without internet for so long and now I actually get irritated when I'm on it so I have really been avoiding it), it was very good!
Rana arrived on his bike to pick me up and we went to the tea stall hangout to see his friends and have some tea. The man that runs the stall is very fond of the kids that hang out there and they all call him uncle. He is always very nice to me and he makes the best milk tea in the city in this bideshi‘s opinion, I was happy to go there for tea!! “Mama (uncle) has been missing you too, so he will be happy to see you!”
Mama actually did get a big smile (which he quickly hid right away) when we pulled up, it was totally cute. We had a cup of tea and chatted awhile. I asked Rana to tell Mama that I thought he made the best milk tea in the city, and I watched him blush and wave off the compliment. Rana was dressed in the white Punjabi I remembered him wearing for a friend’s wedding, so I asked him about it. “Oh, it’s because tonight is my friend’s wedding party - you will enjoy the party too.” Oh! I’m going to a wedding party!! I looked down at my clothes and laughed once more quietly to myself… I guess there’s no way I really would have dressed any differently had I known in advance, but jeez, I would have at least combed my hair!! : ) Oh well, nobody will care!
We walked from the tea stall to his friend Shohel’s house. The family and a few of his friend’s were gathered in his family house, and it was a sort of bachelor party (though NOTHING like what those words conjure for those of us in the wild wild west!). He was sitting on a table surrounded in food, and each new person that entered took a turn to go up and say hello and feed him something from the trays - I got to do it too!! I felt a little silly offering the grown man food but it was actually really nice. It is offered as a way of showing your support and love for him in his big step of getting married, and I thought it was very nice, and it was quite an intimate moment to share with a stranger really. The family took many pictures and I wished him well with his wedding (which was happening the next day) and married life.
We ate biryani (which usually I don’t eat because it turns my stomach inside out, but homemade food has been safe in most cases (when it doesn’t involve beef) so far) and fried chicken and chatted, it was very nice. The women were all dressed in red and orange saris with gerbera daisies in their hair, they looked so beautiful and I wish I had taken more photos!
For the next couple of hours I visited with his family and then went up to the roof to hang out with the young folk. Everyone here gauges my age around 25, so I fit in well with all the young people. They were decorating the bridal suite with styrofoam wrapped in pink tulle, trying to make it nice for the newly married couple the following night - quite a feat for a group of boys!! We said our goodbyes and I thanked them for welcoming me; Shohel’s eldest sister invited me to come the next day for the wedding as well and of course I was ticked pink. Rana said he would bring me, and with that we headed back to the tea stall.
Around 1030 I was ready to go and Rana dropped me off at my hotel. It was a great day, very fun, but exhausting to be friendly and social with so many strangers so I was very tired. I wanted to take a few minutes to write but I was done-for so I just washed up and crawled into bed… that’s it for another day! Tomorrow… Bengali New Year and a wedding!!
It has been a quiet day to myself so far. I’ve agreed to meet 3 different friends at some point in the day, one at 2, one at 5, one at 730, and one at 930, lol… jeez, talk about a busy social calendar - this is SO unlike me! This morning I slept in until 8 and then uploaded photos to my zip drive so I could make CDs for the friends who had gone on trips with me. I went for a late breakfast at 930 in my favourite restaurant. It’s been awhile since I’ve been there alone, so the restaurant staff took advantage of the time to gather round and watch me eat and push one another for the job of refilling my water or bringing extra food to my table.
I tried the market a couple times to get the photo CDs made, but the power outages were quite bad today so I kept missing my chance! I did finally drop them off while the power was on and half-way through the power went out. You might think that people who depend on computers as part of their job would have some sort of battery backup to at least get them through saving or finishing the one thing they were working on, but I have only seen one person set up this way so far.
So after the market I met my friend Limon for lunch. We went to Hilsha Fish, a restaurant near the Shai Bazaar and had fish, green mango, daal and rice, it was very nice. When we finished lunch we went on our way to visit his family. While enroute I got a call from Shahed that his son was very sick and he had been given emergency leave to go home for a week, he asked me to meet him at the station. Limon was good enough not to mind and we redirected our rickshaw wallah back the way we came to meet at the station.
Shahed arrived and said he was going to try and get a ticket for later that evening after he went back and got his bags. Turned out that there was a train leaving shortly and he decided to take it because he would get home six hours sooner. I waited while he bought a ticket and visited for the half hour until the train arrived. His roommate also came, he is a good friend, and he visited with Limon while I visited with Limon. This is probably the last time I am going to see him, so I was sad to leave and couldn’t help the tears as he boarded and the train left the station… man, goodbyes are hard, WHY don‘t they get any easier?
We stood on the platform and I waved for as long as I could still see Shahed with his whole upper body sticking out the train window waving and disappearing into the distance. Limon did a good job of trying to cheer me up and we continued on our way again to meet his family. I pushed my head “back in the game” and let go of my sadness and chatted with Limon in the rickshaw.
“We are not a rich family…” was how he began as we pulled into his neighbourhood, and I shushed him and told him I didn’t care about how rich his family might be, that I was just happy to be visiting. First I met his mom, sister, and father. They served me fruit and fishcakes and tea and we sat and visited. His sister spoke English well so the three of us chatted while his mom looked around and tried to get me to eat for 3. As we sat neighbours kept poking their head in, many of them (let’s say about 15?) jammed into the doorway to watch us, Limon had a ball the whole time and kept saying “you are very interesting for them!” After we took a few pictures we continued on, as he has 5 uncles and we were promised to visit each house in turn, so away we went!
One house to the next, each family feeding and watering me, they were all very kind and very excited and friendly. A few times they asked questions, mostly they commented on how white I am (I *SWEAR* I have been trying to get a tan!) and how friendly I was.
When we visited with one of his cousins, a very lovely girl with good English skills, said gave me a glass of ice cold 7-Up in a pretty mug. When I commented on the pretty blue and silver design on the mug she said “it is my most favourite mug, so I wanted you to use it when you came to visit.” Such a sweet thing to do, the gesture wasn’t lost on me.
Onto the next house and despite being full from lunch and snacks at the past 3 houses plates of cookies and chips and other dried snacks and more 7-Up came out. The power had gone out while we were in the second house and the girls each took turns fanning me with a bamboo fan. We took pictures as we went along It was her favourite mug, to me “You know Shauna, you look just like a Barbie!” I laughed, a lot, and shook my head as I said thank you, swallowing my comments of argument because it would have been futile to try. “No, really! Just like a Barbie, it’s really true!” She walked arm in arm with me the rest of the way. After the 5th house the aunty invited me to stay for dinner. I thanked her very much and told her that I already had plans with a friend for dinner, so we went on our way.
Limon and I walked out to the main road stopping here and there on the way to say hello to different people. In the market I tried a new snack called Putchka, little shells filled with lentils and egg and onions and other stuff I can’t even tell you without google (it has been quite the exercise, getting used to going without internet for so long and now I actually get irritated when I'm on it so I have really been avoiding it), it was very good!
Rana arrived on his bike to pick me up and we went to the tea stall hangout to see his friends and have some tea. The man that runs the stall is very fond of the kids that hang out there and they all call him uncle. He is always very nice to me and he makes the best milk tea in the city in this bideshi‘s opinion, I was happy to go there for tea!! “Mama (uncle) has been missing you too, so he will be happy to see you!”
Mama actually did get a big smile (which he quickly hid right away) when we pulled up, it was totally cute. We had a cup of tea and chatted awhile. I asked Rana to tell Mama that I thought he made the best milk tea in the city, and I watched him blush and wave off the compliment. Rana was dressed in the white Punjabi I remembered him wearing for a friend’s wedding, so I asked him about it. “Oh, it’s because tonight is my friend’s wedding party - you will enjoy the party too.” Oh! I’m going to a wedding party!! I looked down at my clothes and laughed once more quietly to myself… I guess there’s no way I really would have dressed any differently had I known in advance, but jeez, I would have at least combed my hair!! : ) Oh well, nobody will care!
We walked from the tea stall to his friend Shohel’s house. The family and a few of his friend’s were gathered in his family house, and it was a sort of bachelor party (though NOTHING like what those words conjure for those of us in the wild wild west!). He was sitting on a table surrounded in food, and each new person that entered took a turn to go up and say hello and feed him something from the trays - I got to do it too!! I felt a little silly offering the grown man food but it was actually really nice. It is offered as a way of showing your support and love for him in his big step of getting married, and I thought it was very nice, and it was quite an intimate moment to share with a stranger really. The family took many pictures and I wished him well with his wedding (which was happening the next day) and married life.
We ate biryani (which usually I don’t eat because it turns my stomach inside out, but homemade food has been safe in most cases (when it doesn’t involve beef) so far) and fried chicken and chatted, it was very nice. The women were all dressed in red and orange saris with gerbera daisies in their hair, they looked so beautiful and I wish I had taken more photos!
For the next couple of hours I visited with his family and then went up to the roof to hang out with the young folk. Everyone here gauges my age around 25, so I fit in well with all the young people. They were decorating the bridal suite with styrofoam wrapped in pink tulle, trying to make it nice for the newly married couple the following night - quite a feat for a group of boys!! We said our goodbyes and I thanked them for welcoming me; Shohel’s eldest sister invited me to come the next day for the wedding as well and of course I was ticked pink. Rana said he would bring me, and with that we headed back to the tea stall.
Around 1030 I was ready to go and Rana dropped me off at my hotel. It was a great day, very fun, but exhausting to be friendly and social with so many strangers so I was very tired. I wanted to take a few minutes to write but I was done-for so I just washed up and crawled into bed… that’s it for another day! Tomorrow… Bengali New Year and a wedding!!
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